Good Things About Global Warming

• Penguins discover that when they're not shivering, they can fly after all.

• Kids can lay on their backs and make "dead grass angels" in the yard.

• Eskimos will be warm enough to rub a lot more than noses.

• Iceland will be renamed simply "Land."

• Avalanches will only bury people up to their ankles.

• The Abominable Snowman will become just another abominable guy.

• Never again hear the phrase: "Your food is getting cold."

• Eskimos' 39 different words for snow can be replaced with the single word "puddle."

• Debate over whether any two snowflakes are identical comes to an end.

• Jack Frost stops nipping at your nose, switches to spying on you in your swimsuit.

• Santa's elves can take off their heavy coats and go back to being leprechauns.

• With no need to hibernate, bears finally catch up on chores they've been "meaning to get to."

• "Seeing your breath" becomes clear evidence of a hygiene problem.

• New holiday TV specials like "The Sunscreen That Saved Christmas."

• Unemployed Saint Bernards start bringing rum to those "buried in paperwork."

• Never wince again when someone says "Ant-ar-tic" instead of "Ant-arc-tic."

• Hottentots will simply be called "Tots."

• Hawaii tourism booms with slogan "It's Too Hot To Wear Our Grass Skirts."

• Plenty of hot water for shower, no matter which knob you turn.

• Brass monkeys lose their fear of winter.

• "Baked Alaska" promoted from dessert to state motto.

Submitted by readers of Stilton

Quote Of The Day

"States that pass laws protecting babies from abortion is a dangerous thing".

Nancy Pelosi

The Fake News That Pushed the US Into WWII

 Roosevelt took the stage at The Mayflower Hotel in Washington, DC, to speak in honor of Navy Day. With Britain under Nazi siege, Roosevelt wanted the United States to join the fight. The American public was not convinced.

“I have in my possession a secret map made by Hitler’s government. It is a map of South America and part of Central America, as Hitler proposes to reorganize it,” Roosevelt told the shocked assemblage.

The president then revealed another German document that pledged to eliminate the world’s religions.

The reaction was explosive, but the facts were not. Neither the map nor the religious proclamation was real.

NY Post Oct. 2, 2019

Think about it. What other likes have been told to the American people that have changed the course of history?

Causes Of Death Per Day In US

Uh-Oh

Who Da Thunk It

What I Learned Today

I read an article by Bruce Price in the American Thinker this morning.(If you don't read the AT you should). Anyway, Mr. Price, much to my non-astonishment informed we there are 50 million functional illiterates in this country of 330 million. I suppose this includes illegals but why quibble over 20 million or so.