A Day In The Life Of Joe

 

"A couple of years into his Senate career, Joe Biden had a dream of living grandly by buying on the cheap a former du Pont manse, together with a huge chunk of land, for $200,000. The house was boarded up and soon, probably, to be torn down. But Biden saw something in it. Sure, it needed some fixing up. Never fear, Joe is here! Joe is a can-do fellow. 

The first winter he and Jill spent in the house, it used up 3,000 gallons of fuel oil. It turned out the third floor was wide open, to the stars. Squirrels were living up there. Oops. The judgment on display here is not great. Next year, Biden starting selling off bits of the land for development to pay for improvements such as storm windows. 

Small problem here: One of the lots he sold off was his own driveway, and the new owner blocked it off so he couldn’t pass through it. So Joe built a second driveway, which turned into a swamp in winter. 

He sold off another piece of property that, it turned out, included the front of that second driveway, so he couldn’t use that one anymore either. So he built a third. He hated that one for being a dumpy little thing. 

Eight years went by, and he made a deal to buy back the original driveway, the one he sold off when he first bought the house. Which cost him a fortune in landscaping to reshape."