I'm excited. When I awaken tomorrow morning it will be that special day of the year when hearts flutter and butterflies control the stomach. It's that one day when love is in the air. It's Valentine's Day, 2019.
I jest, of course. Christmas, like Valentine's Day is for kids or teenagers if you will.
I've bought some wonderful gifts for Her Majesty over the years. Strange. I can't remember then offhand. I did buy her a wig once. It was the exact same style as her hair. My thinking was if she was going to be in a hurry it'd be so easy to plop it on her head. Little did I know that women would rather go to the guillotine than leave the house without their hair being perfectly coiffed and blush on their lips. But I tried and that counts for something.
Besides, when a couple is young there has to be trial and error before a guy gets it right. I have learned to never, ever buy clothing. Gift certificates are nice. Get this. I once bought my wife a sexy night gown. She hated it but it wasn't my fault. I'd downed a six pack plus two before the light bulb went on and I pulled out my wallet. I bought it at a Holiday Inn in Morgantown, West Virginia at a sexy lingerie show. The next morning I put it in the garbage. Until now it has never been mentioned and this was in 1990.
Since I'm home bound I do believe I've come up with the perfect gift and a request. I bought my wife a card and told her I'd eat left overs for Valentine's dinner so she's have a break from cooking. Am I a great husband or what?
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