The Art Of Riding A Bicycle

The kids of the 50's and 60's were very lucky in that our bicycles were just that-------bikes. They didn't have all the bells and whistles necessary to make a bike a $400 animal. We kids tooled around town with baseball cards(valuable ones we later found out) in our spokes to make a really cool sound.

I rode a Schwinn until 1975 when I was 29 years old. It went into the garage in Davenport, Iowa, Westerville, Ohio and now Dublin, Ohio. It's had a nice spot on the garage wall for all these years.

In 2004 the wife came up with a great idea(according to her). "Why don't I get a bicycle and we can ride together?" "Yeah sure", I said, "It'll be fun'. So we hung her new bike in the garage and there it's been------------until today.

The Queen plays bridge on Monday mornings and since I'm making a road trip next week a visit to AAA was a necessity. I hadn't ridden a bicycle for 48 years but being adventuring man I dumped it in the back of the Suburu and drove the 3.5 miles to the service station. I was hoping they'd get me in the shop right away but after a half hour of nothing I made the big decision. Tah dah! I'll ride the bike home. I mean, how difficult can it be?

I wasn't certain how to get on so I recalled the way the Lone Ranger mounted Silver. So far so good.

The first mile went well. On mile two I noticed two glaring problems. The bicycle seat was at it's lowest placement so when I pedaled my knees came up to my chin. Secondly, and most serious, the seat itself was small. I mean really small. The best seat I ever sat on was at the Rickenbacker air base restroom in Columbus. It was shaped like a saddle. I could have sat on it for hours. Her Majesty's seat felt like I was sitting on a sewing pin.

My worst situation was at mile 2.4. There was a serve upgrade on the bike path, somewhere around 0.0002. I was fagged and must have looked it. A kind lady stopped and asked if I needed help. In between gasps I said, "I feel like a teenager". She laughed as she drove off. When she was out of site this mornings breakfast welled up into my throat.

Nearing home I took a short cut across the field to our condo and crawled in the front door onto the couch.

I'm not all that concerned about having to ride back to get the car. Since I was a kid someone has come up with this new idea. It's called Uber.