Twenty-Four Truths But Not Quite

I have a friend who forwarded me one of those e-mail lists. Basically, it's for men only. Due to a lack of space I've cut down the list for two reasons: (1)I didn't think some were funny and (2)I might want to elaborate on a few. Wishing to remain anonymous my friend suggested I use his high school nickname. He informed me it was 6-Volt. That in itself should be a good story. I'll find out about it in a week. I have a feeling it's going to be good copy for a blog. The possibilities for 6-Volt are endless.
THE LIST:
I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history when you die.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger.

There is great need for a sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

Was learning cursive really necessary? For me, this is important. When I was in grade school the nuns required us to use the Palmer Method. My penmanship reads like a girl's. It's also the only subject I took where I received an A.

Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty
sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories. Hip-hip hooray for this. I'm the king of bad decisions.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and
hunger. It's the reason the bean bag chair and potato chips were invented.

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up
to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the
Donkey

The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874
and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years
for men to realize that their brain is also important.